February 24, 2026 | Michail Takach

Dr. Benjamin Rieth: lifting the weight of the in-between

After struggling with a lifelong sense of disconnection, Benny found his calling: to create belonging for LGBTQ people in every one of Wisconsin's 72 counties.

“You can absolutely find yourself anywhere – and there is room for all people to find themselves in Wisconsin.”

As an Indigenous, Two-Spirit, gay man, Dr. Benjamin “Benny” Rieth has dedicated both his personal and professional life to exploring how interconnectedness shapes human belonging. His work is purpose-driven, community-connective, and firmly grounded in his spiritual values.

Childhood, disconnected

Benny was born Benjamin Behnke in Sheboygan in 1994 and moved to Kiel July 11th 1997. He grew up in a supportive family of four children, alongside his twin sister and two older sisters. The children were raised with the core belief that family was absolutely everything. They learned the value of supporting each other, showing up for each other, and staying connected.

They were one of the first Indigenous families living in the area, which was very difficult for him. His mother’s family left the Menomonee Indian Reservation during the termination era (1954-1973,) when the federal government dissolved the tribal authority of the Menomonee Nation. His grandmother was part of the Bad River Reservation in northern Wisconsin, where him, his siblings, and their cousins were enrolled in the tribe at birth. His father came from a white, Wisconsin German background, which was dramatically different from his Indigenous heritage, but provided a source of beloved family traditions.

“I loved the history, the food, the holiday traditions,” said Benny. “I valued my German heritage tremendously.”

All these forces collided to leave Benny feeling like he didn’t truly belong anywhere. When he was on the reservation, he didn’t feel Indigenous enough. When he returned to Kiel, he didn’t feel white enough. And despite a loving foundation at home, he came to understand that he had feelings for other boys. These inner conflicts became more difficult over time.

“There was always this feeling of loss, confusion, and isolation,” said Benny. “I felt very alone and it really shaped my experiences in Kiel. I wanted to fit in with the social norms, without feeling different, but at the same time, I wanted to be different.”

“My family was always doing presentations on Native heritage in the school system, but it sometimes increased the divide, because it pointed out how different we were. I couldn’t find community and I couldn’t connect with people. Something was missing.”

Growing up, Benny experienced a steady, exhausting undercurrent of discrimination. Many individuals -- sometimes even close friends who “meant no harm” -- treated his background as a novelty or a punchline. His heritage frequently became a comfortable target for others to poke fun at. Benny vividly remembers classmates chanting racist and stereotypical phrases about Native people.

One particularly haunting moment occurred in middle school when Benny was subjected to racial slurs while being pushed back and forth inside a typical bullying circle. That specific incident made the ongoing microaggressions he faced feel highly personal and painful.

As he grew older, the bullying became assumptions. For example, people casually suggested that Benny must have attended college for free, incorrectly implying his path was easier or less earned, even though his tribe provides very limited educational funding. These comments reinforced harmful Native misconceptions and minimized the hard work he was putting in.

Benny also notes that being white passing became a source of tension. On one hand, it allowed him to fly under the radar in difficult environments and avoid direct discrimination, something he was occasionally grateful for. On the other hand, it brought a persistent sense of guilt and invisibility, leaving parts of his identity either questioned or entirely unseen.

From middle school through graduate school, Benny was frequently forced into the exhausting position of being the designated "voice" for Native people during classroom discussions. Whenever topics of current events, history, or social justice arose, there was a lingering expectation that Benny should educate others or provide the sole Indigenous perspective.

While Benny deeply values sharing his perspective and knowledge, he found the constant pressure to represent the experiences of a diverse, multicultural civilization to be isolating. These moments shaped his deep awareness of inclusion, equity, and belonging in education.

Awakenings

Benny always recognized that he had crushes on friends and classmates, but never really knew what he could do about it. Although he believed it was normal to be attracted to men, he also believed he couldn’t act on these feelings.

While chatting online with someone from Sheboygan, Benny was shocked when the other person confessed something shocking. They found him attractive.

“Throughout high school, I’d been so desperate for any feeling of connection,” said Dr. Benny. “So, obviously I snuck out of my house to meet this guy.”

Later, while attending choir camp, he shared his first kiss with a boy, recalling the butterflies in his stomach and intense feelings of nervousness.

“I remember knowing something had to be right about this, because of how it made me feel, even though society made it feel kind of wrong.”

Knowing something was missing in his life, and wanting to leave Kiel, Benny attended St. Norbert College in Green Bay. While it was a predominantly white institution, it was a place where he could finally connect with other Indigenous students. He joined the Students Taking Academic Responsibility (STAR) program, an initiative that allowed BIPOC students to arrive at college early and form a close-knit community.

“SNC was the first place I felt I could truly be myself,” he said. “I came out only two months after I was there .”

During his first year of college, Benny also learned about the term "Two-Spirit," a Native identity never before mentioned in his upbringing. For Benny, being Two-Spirit represents an understanding of intersectionality, offering him a meaningful way to understand himself at a higher level.

At St. Norbert, Benny pursued an undergraduate degree in music and liberal arts, alongside a minor in leadership studies. He met his future husband, Ryan, at the end of his junior year. They dated for ten months and were happily engaged by spring break of senior year.

Two years later, they were married, and Benny took Ryan’s last name (Rieth.)

Dr. Benny started asking himself: what are the characteristics of true belonging? What makes people feel safe to be their authentic selves? These defining questions began to guide his life’s work.

Building new bridges

Following his undergraduate studies, Benny moved to Milwaukee to attend Marquette University, earning his master's degree in Masters of Educational Policy and Leadership.

However, he and his husband soon realized the city just wasn't for them. The city felt too removed from their families -- with Ryan's family in Green Bay and Benny's in Kiel -- and placed them entirely too far away from the reservations. They subsequently moved back to Green Bay, which Benny describes as the perfect size, and where he feels far more connected. Today, Ryan works in the human resources field in Green Bay.

Truth be told, Benny never truly felt seen or represented in academia. Throughout his undergraduate and master’s studies, he did not feel meaningfully reflected in his curriculum, encountering absolutely no lectures, readings, or frameworks that centered BIPOC or LGBTQ perspectives in substantive ways. Most classroom approaches relied heavily on Westernized ways of knowing, effectively leaving relational approaches to knowledge and Indigenous worldviews completely unspoken.

When Benny entered his doctoral program, things began to shift. His program director, Dr. Gavin Henning, intentionally worked to incorporate multiple ways of knowing and being into the coursework. Dr. Henning introduced Benny to the book Research Is Ceremony by Shawn Wilson, a moment Benny emphatically describes as transformative.

For the very first time, Benny encountered formal scholarship that reflected his identity and affirmed that his relational worldview and Indigenous identity absolutely belonged in these spaces. Though Wilson’s work was Benny’s first formal exposure to Indigenous scholarship, he intentionally continued to read, learn from, and build relationships with other Indigenous scholars, including Dr. Tricia McGuire-Adams, Dr. Denise K. Henning, Dr. Stephanie Waterman, and many others.

Benny now understood his place within academia. He was launched on a deeper journey to engage with other Indigenous scholars and actively build community within Indigenous research spaces. His approach – and his identity – felt more affirmed than ever before.

Today, Benny actively carries this vital validation forward in his own mentoring and scholarship. In his published article, Creating Joy: Connecting Your Tribal Background to Your Research Studies, featured in the American Indian Culture and Research Journal, Benny proudly models for emerging Indigenous scholars that their ways of knowing, communities, and identities are not only valid in research, but are necessary and powerful.

The power of positive mentorship

Benny notes that losing grandparents on his moms side young often means losing the people who are supposed to teach cultural knowledge, requiring reliance on outside sources, distant relatives, and teachers to successfully keep the culture alive.

Driven by a lack of LGBTQ+ guidance in his own youth, Benny is deeply passionate about mentoring. He still wishes he had a queer mentor back then: a coach, guide, elder, or confidante who could help him feel less scared. To overcome these extensive barriers for today's youth, Benny advocates for several necessary structural changes:

Creating formal mentorship programs: Community organizations, colleges, and schools must safely connect youth with trained, affirming adults by creating intentional, formal mentorship structures rather than relying on chance.

Investing in visible role models: Implementing inclusive curriculum, storytelling projects, and speaker series helps youth see what is possible.

Establishing virtual mentorship networks: These networks are crucial for actively reducing geographic barriers, especially in isolated rural regions.

Fostering safe environments for adults: Supportive workplace climates, strong nondiscrimination policies, and leadership that openly values LGBTQ inclusion drastically increases the likelihood of mentors being visible and available in the first place.

Ensuring mentorship stays relational: Mentorship is vastly more powerful when it is culturally responsive, rooted in community, and grounded in belonging.

“When young people fail to see adults thriving and living openly, it becomes incredibly difficult for them to know who to turn to for guidance or to imagine possible futures for themselves,” said Benny.

“LGBTQ youth are far more likely to see pathways to thrive when they are surrounded by adults who affirm their identities, accurately reflect their community, and share their cultural experiences.”

Unfortunately, queer adults have always been cautious about being visible due to workplace policies, cultural pressures, safety concerns, or fear of discrimination.

“It’s totally understandable,” said Benny. “LGBTQ adults who hold other marginalized identities are frequently overextended by the emotional labor required of them. Without recognition, compensation, or institutional support, mentorship can quickly become unsustainable, further limiting the number of youth who receive meaningful support.”

Maintaining a healthy balance

Because his advocacy work is highly demanding, Benny actively works to prevent burnout through restorative balance. He finds his joy by staying active: cycling, working out at the Greater Green Bay YMCA, and simply being outside. Benny finds a remarkably strong sense of balance and peace in the outdoors, particularly when he is "up north.”

He is also highly passionate about trying new foods and visiting new restaurants, viewing food as one of his absolute favorite ways to connect with others and intimately experience culture.

Most importantly, time spent traveling with his husband and being with his family completely refills his cup, effectively pulling him back to what matters most in life.

When asked what inspires him most, Benny points directly to the communities he is accountable to and the specific people who have poured into him. His family remains a profound source of inspiration, particularly the way he and his sisters were raised to show up for each other.

He carries deep gratitude for mentors like Dr. Shelly Morris, whose commitment to creating spaces of belonging actively shaped his path in student affairs. He is equally grateful for Dr. Gavin Henning, describing him as one of the very biggest allies in his entire journey. Dr. Henning consistently ensures representation matters and that there is always space at the table. Benny greatly values Henning's willingness to bend a listening ear and show others the ropes, noting that kind of leadership has meant a great deal to him.

Indigenous community knowledge keepers and scholars also keep Benny's fire actively going, reminding him daily that his work belongs to a much longer continuum.

What truly keeps his torches lit, however, is emerging professionals and students. Watching someone finally begin to see themselves as belonging -- often for the very first time -- refuels him in a way unlike any other.

Simply being together is Benny’s most cherished family tradition. Because his family was very close growing up, they usually maintained a central "hub" house. Benny is incredibly grateful that his own home has now become that hub. These days, his family is frequently over hanging out, sharing meals, letting the kids spend time together, and playing cards.

For Benny, the cherished tradition is not about formal events, but rather the powerful consistency of making time to be in the same space and genuinely showing up for one another.

In an increasingly busy world, continuing to intentionally make space for each other feels deeply meaningful and deeply grounding. He is profoundly proud of keeping this spirit of togetherness alive and remains steadfastly committed to carrying it forward.

Despite living a life powered by positive energy, Benny harbors deep concerns about the current political and social moment. He notes that while progress had been moving forward fast, those wins are now being aggressively pushed backwards. He recalls a time when people were not ruled by fear, but now he observes fear is on the rise again.

Benny wonders how to keep safe spaces genuinely safe. While sitting on a a dissertation defense last week Rural Roots, Urban Suits: Queer Men’s Migration from Wisconsin’s Countryside to Cityscapes by Samuel Minch, Benny thought back to his own experience in Kiel. What differences would have made him want to stay? Who is out there today in Wisconsin feeling disconnected and alone in their own hometown?

Sharing stories for Wisconsin’s future

Recently, Benny left his role as Vice President of Student Affairs, Enrollment, and Belonging at Bellin College to work full-time as a consultant. His company, BelongingU: Rieth Strategy Solutions, actively works with universities, nonprofits, and other workplaces, helping them through interconnectedness, storytelling, relationality, and Indigenous ways of being. Benny leads with story, joy, and possibility.

As a storyteller grounded in Indigenous ways of being, he approaches his work with a belief that the glass is always half full and that every campus and organization already holds the seeds of belonging within it.

Benny’s research-informed approach is rooted in his theory the Five Rs of belonging—relationships, relevance, reciprocity, respect, and responsibility. Rather than focusing on what is broken, he helps institutions and organizations see what is already working, inviting them to build from strengths, lived experiences, and community wisdom. Through storytelling, reflection, and evidence-based practice, Benny creates space for people to reconnect with purpose, joy, and one another.

Benny emphasizes the concept of relationality, an Indigenous way of being that focuses intimately on how everything is connected, including people, space, water, land, nature, and the different relationships surrounding us. This organic interconnectedness is a core lesson he has actively been trying to teach his students.

Benny continues to maintain strong relationships with the reservations. He proudly dances Woodland style at the Pow Wows and still partners with College of Menominee Nation. This June, he plans to volunteer at Wisconsin’s first Two-Spirit Pow Wow, an event that his cousin Rain is planning.

Benny passionately believes people should attend the Two Spirit Pow Wow to expand their understanding, hear stories, and see exactly what the community is all about. He asserts that education is powerful, and exposure to different things will inevitably lead people to make a stand for matters outside themselves. Benny wants the next generation to have the vital exposure and understanding that he fundamentally lacked.

He wants youth to be exposed to different religions, cultures, and things, helping them recognize that while they all look different, they are all uniquely beautiful.

Benny recently launched the Queer Storybook Project, which aims to collect unique stories from each of the 72 counties in Wisconsin. He believes the initiative (like the Wisconsin LGBTQ History Project) creates the most meaningful positive change in Wisconsin by centering community ownership, relational storytelling, and visibility.

Because many Indigenous and LGBTQ+ stories have historically been overlooked or explicitly erased in Wisconsin, especially in rural areas, Benny notes that simply documenting and sharing authentic lived experiences acts as a highly powerful intervention. Seeing oneself reflected in history directly affirms belonging.

“Encountering stories that are vastly different from your own actively disrupts stereotypes and builds radical empathy,” said Benny. “This work showcases the true beauty of Wisconsin, its resilient people and their layered identities.”

What does he hope the Storybook Project will achieve?

“I want the book to be vibrantly celebrated,” said Benny. “I want elderly people and high school students alike to see it. I want queer folks to see themselves in these pages. I want everyone to understand that Wisconsin is a place where they can thrive, live and be fully themselves.”

“You can absolutely find yourself anywhere – and there is room for all people to find themselves in Wisconsin.”