September 29, 2025 | Amy Luettgen

Kevin Perdue: born and raised by queer revolution

Meet Kevin Perdue, who shares how an activist upbringing helped him embrace his bisexual, demisexual, and leather identities.

Kevin Perdue

“My moms always said I was a leader, and I know that is what they would say about me now.”

Kevin Perdue, also known as Sparkie Bootblack, has lived an immersive life in the Queer community. Born on the cusp of Gen X and the millennial generation, Kevin is an adoptee. He was relinquished by his lesbian birth mother to a lesbian couple, at the age of eight, and raised in Vermont. His parents were both LGBT activists and Kevin was brought up during a period of intense queer activism.

Recognizing his bisexuality after having come out as gay in his teens and also embracing his leather identity, Kevin's route to authenticity and acceptance was and remains unique.

Born in Burlington, Vermont and growing up in Montpelier, Vermont’s capital, Kevin was engaged in activism from a very young age. His parents were instrumental in engaging in LGBT adoption issues, marriage equality, and LGBT rights. The family hosted many advocates for equality. Holly Near, a folksinger and bi+ icon, was a close friend of Kevin’s family. Kevin testified in the Vermont statehouse in favor of queer adoption at the tender age of 10. He supported his lesbian moms and wanted to normalize their family dynamic. He attended protests and celebrations during Stonewall25 as a teen. He doesn’t remember a time when the thrum of advocacy and reform did not hum in his household.

“This world gave me a perspective most people don’t have. I’ve been in the mainstream of Queer activism my whole life. It’s always been a part of me, a part of my DNA.”

Kevin was involved with the ACLU at the age of 10 and volunteered with the Vermont Coalition for Lesbian and Gay Rights. He is rightly proud of his lifetime of engagement and volunteerism with the LGBTQ community. As well as Near, Kevin met and got to know other entertainers and activists in the community such as the Nylons, the Flirtations and so many other folks who would visit Vermont to participate in advocacy.

Kevin Perdue

Kevin Perdue and friends

Kevin's bi pride leather vest

As far as his own story is involved, Kevin remembers coming out as gay at the age of 8, and his Mom’s reactions were, “um, duh,” he says with a laugh.

His situation was the opposite of so many brought up in heterosexual households, as being queer was seen as the default. Kevin had boyfriends who were, of course, welcomed in his home. It was not until he was in his twenties and having some different experiences that Kevin came to the realization of his bi identity.

As a Holly Near album title would put it, Imagine My Surprise.

“It just happened, like it does for a lot of people. It was cool.”

He realized that he was onto something different and needed to investigate his feelings more deeply. Kevin was with a boyfriend at the time and realized he would have to come out to his moms as bi. His biological mom, also a lesbian, was not very receptive to Kevin’s revelation, calling him a "fence rider." His adoptive parents were more accepting

"At first, they had questions and asked me if I was sure," said Kevin. "My moms said I had always brought home boyfriends and then, all of a sudden, I brought home a woman that I am dating."

While it did take them a bit of time to wrap their heads around Kevin’s bisexuality, they are strong supporters now and have a wonderful relationship with Kevin’s wife of almost 10 years.

“Me, my wife and one of my adoptive mothers talk all the time. It did take them a little time to acknowledge that my bisexuality is not a phase and it is just who I am.”

Prior to recognizing that he was bisexual, Kevin was embracing his Leather identity. At this point in his life, Kevin has four leather titles to boast about: Blue Max’s Daddy’s Boy (2001) Leather Boy (2009); Illinois Community Bootblack (2015) and Wisconsin Leather Pride Person of Leather (2020-2023/Covid years). Kevin is proud of his titles and has been active in the Leather community since his late teens.

While Kevin said he did not have any role models or mentors in the bi+ community, he did have a role model for his leather identity. His name is Jerry Ocasta.

“I met him in a bar called Pearls. This was my first introduction to a leather title holder. Jerry was American Leather Boy at the time. He lives in San Francisco now, but I talk to him often.”

Kevin also had leather ‘uncles’ who stored their leather gear at his mothers’ house because they were still living at home and could not keep their leather there. He definitely felt seen and affirmed in his leather identity from an early age. Kevin sees many bisexual folks within his leather kin; some are closeted and some are not.

“In the Leather cohort, pins are very important. You wear them on your leathers to identify who you are. I always have bi colors on my vest. In the leather community, your vest is a focal point. I do this to make sure folks who are bi know I am a safe person for them to know and to come out to.”

Kevin also makes sure to have other bi bling displayed prominently, whether it is a necklace or a bracelet. Bi+ folks know they can start a conversation with him, and he will be supportive and affirming. Kevin also identifies as a demisexual and makes sure he displays all of his colors.

“It gives me joy to be able to be there for other bi+ folks. They know they are seen.”

During his title years, Kevin has made a big part of his soapbox being seen as a bisexual, demisexual man.

“We do title pins, and my title pin is literally the demisexual bisexual flag, which helps with having a platform to discuss issues of identity. My hope is that this helps everyone who wants to express who they are.”

As a bi+ person, Kevin calls himself ‘old school’ and by that he means he is attracted to cis men and cis women but also the entire universe of gender. Kevin sees the terms bisexual and pansexual to mean basically the same thing. He wants to be supportive of anyone with non-monosexual attractions. While he is married to a straight cis woman and his relationship can appear to be heterosexual, that could not be further from the truth of who he is.

“It doesn’t matter what our relationship might look like. We are still who we are.”

When asked about how myths about bisexuality have impacted him, Kevin is quick to point out that he does remember some negativity from gay men who snubbed him when he introduced his submissive/girlfriend at the time. Many of the comments made were disrespectful, such as ‘what are you doing with that woman?’

“It sometimes feels as though there are some who want to put bi folks in a secondary closet. I have to see who is safe and who will make cracks. They might think they are being funny, but sometimes these cracks are very hurtful.”

Kevin states we should all be supporting each other in the LGBTQ community, and, unfortunately, that is not always the case. Kevin always wants to be loud and to be seen for his complete identity. As his mom would say silence is complicity so Kevin knows he has to fearlessly express everything he is: bi and demi and a leather daddy.

As far as having the bi+ folks be more impactful in the larger LGBTQ community, Kevin suggests clear communication. He encourages people not to be quiet about their bisexuality but to be clear and honest about who they are. In general, Kevin feels the Leather community is welcoming to people of all identities. As a trusted bootblack, Kevin has heard many stories of personal experiences and sexuality. While a bootblack does care for the leather garments, they are also keepers of leather history. For instance, Mr Illinois Gay Rodeo wears the bi flag on his leathers. The leather community is diverse, and Kevin always wants to do his part to encourage and elevate that diversity.

Kevin has much to be proud of, and his voice is thick with emotion when he speaks of the journey a little boy from Vermont has taken.

“My moms always said I was a leader, and I know that is what they would say about me now.”

He is proud of celebrating his 10th wedding anniversary this year. He is proud of being the owner of Wisconsin Leather Pride and making that organization inclusive and diverse. He is proud of volunteering with International Mister Leather/International Mister Bootblack in Chicago, an international contest that he used to attend when he was younger.

While he has concerns about the current political climate and its impact on the LGBTQ community, he knows, from experience, the difference advocacy and activism can make because he has lived and participated in making a difference before.

“We just need to stick together and go forward and do everything in our power to maintain our strength and to maintain our rights.”

Kevin’s advice to everyone, especially young queer people, is to be who you are and not let anyone else dictate who you are.

“If you want to be a puppy, be a puppy. If you want to be a bisexual trans man, be a bisexual trans man. Be yourself and be proud.”

In 10 or 20 years, Kevin would like to see the community throw out all the phobias, whether it is biphobia or transphobia, or any other kind of phobia. He would like to see a united culture that enriches society as a whole and that supports every member regardless of their identity. As someone who took time to determine who he is and who completely inhabits his bisexual, demisexual leather daddy selfhood, Kevin knows everyone can claim their authenticity and live their lives in a way that enriches not only themselves but everyone around them.

Kevin Perdue