Parents and Friends of Lesbians And Gays (PFLAG)

PFLAG (Parents and Friends of Lesbians And Gays) was founded in 1972, when Jeanne Manford (1920-2013) publicly advocated for gay people and their families. After her son Morty, a gay rights activist, was brutalized while in police custody, Jeanne sprang into activism of her own. She marched with Morty in the June 25, 1972 New York Pride March, carrying a flag that read "Parents of Gays Unite in Support of our Children."

"Young people were hugging me, kissing me, screaming, asking if I would talk to their parents...they were not out to their parents out of fear of rejection," Manford remembered later. The experience inspired her to form an organization that would bridge the gay and heterosexual communities.  She and her husband Jules hosted the first Parents of Gays meeting on March 11, 1973 at the Church of the Village (201 W. 13th St., New York City.)

The organization that grew from her efforts eventually became PFLAG, the nation's first and largest organization dedicated to supporting, educating and advocating for LGBTQ people and those who love them.

Wisconsin became an important part of that movement during the 1980s.

Madison was home to one of Wisconsin's earliest PFLAG efforts. Local advocate Jane LaFlash connected with PFLAG National organizer Adele Starr in the late 1970s and began working to establish a local parent-support network.

Early meetings were small and private. Parents were often reluctant to identify themselves publicly, and some meetings were held in church basements. But LaFlash persisted.  She worked with Joann Elder and others to build a more formal PFLAG presence in Madison. The first meeting was held on March 2, 1985 at the LaFlash home.  Seven people showed up -- and Jane and her son were two of the seven attendees. The group quickly grew. By December 1987, about 20 people were attending monthly meetings. PFLAG Madison also began working with local LGBTQ organizations, including the historic Gay Center and the organization that eventually became OutReach LGBTQ+ Community Center.

PFLAG's role soon expanded beyond support. In May 1989, the Madison chapter hosted a "Coming Out to Your Parents" workshop that attracted approximately 75 people. Later that day, members participated in Madison's first Pride Parade.

PFLAG Milwaukee was officially established in 1989. For many Milwaukee parents, PFLAG addressed a need that went far beyond understanding sexual orientation. America saw a tremendous spike in violent anti-gay hate crimes throughout the 1990s. Longtime chapter leader Georgia Henry, who joined PFLAG in 1999, recalled that the primary emotion bringing many parents to the organization was not rejection of their children, but fear for their safety. 

Over time, many PFLAG members moved from seeking support to becoming advocates themselves. Henry eventually became president of PFLAG Milwaukee and later served as a regional director for PFLAG's Northern Plains region.

Rather than allowing fear to isolate families, PFLAG gave parents tools to educate others, challenge discrimination and stand publicly beside their LGBTQ children.

The movement soon spread beyond Wisconsin's largest cities.

In Door County, advocate Sandy Brown became an important force behind the creation of a local chapter. Brown had experienced PFLAG as a source of support herself and recognized the need for similar resources in a community where LGBTQ services were limited.

In 1995, Brown became a PFLAG representative in Door County. Two years later, a letter from a young gay man describing his isolation and suicidal thoughts reinforced the need for a local organization. In 1997, following a community gathering inspired by Ellen DeGeneres' coming-out announcement, PFLAG Door County was officially established.

The chapter provided one of the few local places where LGBTQ people and their families could meet, find information and build community. It also became an advocate for LGBTQ rights, including organizing against Wisconsin's proposed constitutional ban on same-sex marriage in 2005.

PFLAG's growth reflected an important reality: LGBTQ people and their families lived everywhere in Wisconsin -- not just in Madison and Milwaukee.

Other chapters emerged across the state:

• PFLAG Cambridge
• PFLAG Lake Country 
• PFLAG Manitowoc County
• PFLAG Marshfield
• PFLAG Mount Horeb
• PFLAG River Falls
• PFLAG Waukesha
• PFLAG Waupaca
• PFLAG Washburn (Chequamegon Bay)

Together, these chapters created a statewide family support network that connected urban, suburban, small-town and rural communities.

Jeanne Manford passed away January 8, 2013 at age 92. She received many accolades during and after her life, including Grand Marshall of the 1991 NYC Gay Pride March, a 2012 Presidential Citizens Medal, and inclusion on the National LGBTQ Wall of Honor at the Stonewall National Monument in 2019.